Making Sugary Food and Drink Products More Expensive

Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar. Do you agree or disagree?

Annotated response

9 correction notes

Showing 9 correction notes.

Many people believe that food and beverages that are high in sugar should be sold at high prices to discourage people from consuming these unhealthy products. I totally disagree because I think that it is unfair for these products are other more effective ways to discourage consumption of these types of goods.

The main reason why I believe these products should not be made more expensive is that it is unfair to shoppers. These types of goods, when consumed in moderation, are not a health risk and therefore it does not seem reasonable that everybody who consumes these goods should have to pay more. Furthermore, for people on a tight budget, a sweet snack is an affordable luxury. However, might put people’s favourite snack out of reach.

In addition, there are more effective ways to sugary goods. The best way is for the government to engage in public service advertising to educate the public about the need to eat these types of products in moderation. This type of approach has been useful with other such as alcohol and cigarettes and so it seems reasonable that it will also work for sugary products. Another effective way to of these types of products. I feel this will be effective because it will to consume these types of goods.

In conclusion, I am totally against increasing the price of . This is because it is not fair to consumers and there are better ways to reduce consumption of these sugary goods.

Overall assessment

Why this response received Band 7.0

The response presents a clear, consistently maintained disagreement and develops both supporting reasons with relevant explanation and examples. The main limitation is some repetitiveness in vocabulary and phrasing, alongside occasional minor grammatical slips, which keep the language from reaching the highest bands.

IELTS criteria

How each score was decided

Task Response

7.0

The response addresses all parts of the task with a clearly stated and consistently developed position, well-supported main ideas about fairness and alternative measures, though development is somewhat extended rather than deeply nuanced.

Coherence and Cohesion

7.0

Ideas progress logically across well-organised paragraphs with a range of cohesive devices used naturally, with only minor mechanical referencing such as the repeated use of 'these types of goods'.

Lexical Resource

7.0

Vocabulary is sufficiently flexible and precise for the argument, with some less common items like 'hiked' and 'affordable luxury', but repetition of phrases such as 'these types of products' limits the range.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy

7.0

A variety of complex structures are used with good flexibility and control, and errors are minor and rare, such as the omission in 'unfair to consumers charge more'.