Importance of Having at Least One Hobby

It is important for children, young adults, working people and the retired to have at least one hobby. What's your opinion about this?

Annotated response

12 correction notes

I think that it is very important for children, young adults, working people and retired people to have at least one hobby. In my opinion, more interesting and also helps us to relax.

Firstly, people can forget about their problems when they are doing something they like. For example, working people can be very tired after work, so they can play games, watch movies or go to the gym. This helps them to feel better. Young people also have a lot of and hobbies can .

Secondly, hobbies can help us learn new things. For example, if somebody likes cooking, they can learn how to make . If a person likes sport, they can become . I also think that hobbies can help people .

, I like playing computer games and going to the gym. Sometimes I am very tired after school, but when I do these things, I feel more relaxed. I do my hobbies every day, but they are still important for me.

To conclude, I think everyone should have a hobby because it makes life more interesting and helps people to relax. It matter how old can find something they enjoy.

Overall assessment

Why this response received Band 5.5

The response takes a clear position and supports it with relevant, if simple, reasons and personal examples. Its strongest aspect is the logical, easy-to-follow structure from introduction to conclusion, while the main limitation is the brevity and the elementary, repetitive language, with ideas developed only at a surface level and falling 29 words short of the minimum length.

IELTS criteria

How each score was decided

Task Response

5.5

The position is clear and consistent, and each group mentioned in the prompt is at least touched on, but ideas are developed only in simple, general terms, the coverage is uneven toward the writer's own experience, and the response is under the minimum length.

Coherence and Cohesion

6.0

Paragraphing is logical and basic connectors such as firstly, secondly and for example are used appropriately, though linking is occasionally mechanical and progression within paragraphs remains simple.

Lexical Resource

5.5

Vocabulary is adequate for the message but restricted and repetitive, relying on common words like hobby, relax and interesting, with only occasional attempts at less common expression and some informal or imprecise phrasing.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy

5.5

Sentence forms are mostly simple and compound with some accurate complex structures, but errors such as missing apostrophes, article omissions and 'hobby makes our life' recur and show limited grammatical range.

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