Brain Drain of Professionals to Developed Countries

An increasing number of professionals, such as doctors and teachers, are leaving their own poorer countries to work in developed countries. What problems does this cause? What solutions can you suggest to deal with this situation?

7 sample answers, estimated Band 6.5–7.5. Your turn?

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From essays on this question

Essay ideas: Brain Drain of Professionals to Developed Countries

WhyThis is aProblem and solution essay — it asks for causes or problems, and for ways to solve them.

SoWe split the ideas intoCauses & problems(what causes it or goes wrong)andSolutions(how to fix it).

Causes & problems

5 ideas

Solutions

7 ideas

Same question · Different responses

Sample responses and feedback

Response 01

Must fixSuggested

Essay · 514 words · 4 paragraphs · 22 comments

Score details

Response 01
Estimated band6.5/ 9

Overall assessment

The essay addresses both problems and solutions, with substantial relevant discussion. However, several inaccurate or unclear expressions obscure the ideas, particularly the description of professionals being "promulgated". Long sentences, an agreement error and a sentence fragment also reduce control. Rare vocabulary is not automatically wrong, but its meaning must fit the intended claim.

TR

Task Response

The essay addresses both questions fully, presents developed main ideas about brain drain and a clear set of solutions, and supports them with a relevant example, though some argument development is verbose rather than sharply focused.

7.0
CC

Coherence and Cohesion

Progression is broadly clear with logical paragraphing and linking devices, but cohesion is at times strained by long, convoluted sentences and slightly forced transitions such as 'Further are the problems posed'.

6.5
LR

Lexical Resource

The response attempts a wide range of vocabulary, but expressions such as "anchoring rostrum", "they shall be promulgated" and "paucity and lacuna of the health index" obscure meaning. By contrast, "garnered notoriety" is valid, and the rare verb "guerdoning" does mean rewarding.

6.0
GRA

Grammatical Range and Accuracy

There is a range of complex structures, but control is uneven. The fragment beginning "Hence, making a poor country poorer" lacks a main verb, while "the wages, which is" has an agreement problem. Long sentences also make several relationships harder to follow.

6.5

What to work on next

Replace inflated or misused vocabulary with precise, natural word choices so that the strong ideas are communicated with consistent clarity.

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Useful vocabulary: Brain Drain of Professionals to Developed Countries

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Sentence patterns: Brain Drain of Professionals to Developed Countries

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Part 2

You should spend about 40 minutes on this task. Write at least 250 words.

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