Music Bringing Different Cultures and Ages Together

  • Music
  • Culture
  • Age groups

Some people say that music is a good way of bringing people of different cultures and ages together. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

Annotated response

2 correction notes

Music plays a crucial role in our lives and eliminates differences among various cultures and generations. It symbolises harmony and reflects humanity. So, I agree with the notion that music helps bring people from various cultures and generations together. One of the reasons music barriers among different nations and cultures is that people enjoy music from every part of the world, and it speaks the same language, which embodies human emotion, joy, love and sorrow. Music does not need interpretation to be enjoyed and understood as it touches our hearts and resonates in our minds. No matter what language we speak or understand, we appreciate the melody and depth of music which is why people of all ages can sit together and enjoy the same music. For instance, some viral music in foreign languages in our country signifies how it speaks our minds and hearts rather than just a human language. Moreover, nations influence each other with the type of music they produce and the type of musical instruments they use. This amalgamation reduces cultural differences and brings people from different cultures and ages to a common platform. To cite an example, were derived from multiple nations and cultures and people from all these cultures enjoy and love them. Finally, music is an art form which is enjoyed by all, and this helps reduce the generation and age gaps among people. To illustrate, when the national anthem is played, children, adults and elders all tune in to the same emotion, which is patriotism, and their unity is stronger than ever. The same can be said when music evokes other emotions like love, sadness and so on. Besides, some music categories are loved by all, and the listeners feel a sense of togetherness in a divine way which is almost absent in other art forms. It not only eliminates age gaps but also generation and cultural gaps. In conclusion, music, as a universally accepted and supreme art form, enriches our lives and strengthens the connections between us, regardless of our backgrounds, culture and age.

Overall assessment

Why this response received Band 6.5

The response states a clear position and gives relevant examples about music connecting cultures and generations. However, the entire essay is one paragraph, making its main stages harder to follow. The expression excretes barriers is inaccurate, and unnecessary commas around a restrictive relative clause also reduce precision.

IELTS criteria

How each score was decided

Task Response

7.0

The position is clear, consistent, and fully addresses the question, with relevant main ideas and concrete examples such as viral foreign-language songs and national anthems, though some examples are only lightly developed.

Coherence and Cohesion

5.5

The argument moves through cultural connection, shared influences and generational unity, but all 352 words appear in one continuous paragraph. The main points and conclusion need separate grouping; connectors alone do not provide clear paragraph organisation.

Lexical Resource

7.0

There is a good range of topic vocabulary, including amalgamation and a common platform. Excretes barriers is an inaccurate expression for removing barriers. Supreme art form expresses the writer’s opinion rather than constituting a lexical error by itself.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy

7.0

A wide range of complex structures is used with generally good control, but recurring punctuation errors around relative clauses and some awkward constructions slightly reduce accuracy.

More responses with feedback

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