Sample response & feedback

Free University Education for All Students

Question

Some People Think that everyone has the right to have access to university education and that the Government should make it free for all students no matter what financial Backgroud They have. to extend do you agree or disagree with this opinion.

Annotated response

12 correction notes

Showing 12 correction notes.

Many today would argue that higher education is a basic right that should extend to all, regardless of socioeconomic background. In my opinion, I largely disagree since there is more value in improving the relationships between social classes.

Supporters of this policy point out that every taxpayer is entitled to equal treatment. Those who are wealthy typically receive little financial support from the government they have earned a prestigious scholarship. However, such families pay taxes at far higher rates than the average citizen. They have contributed greatly to the federal budget and it is only just that they should receive an equal allocation of their share of government disbursement for university. Without financial aid, these individuals may feel they are being unfairly treated simply because they are .

Although I recognize the legitimate the argument above, I would generally side with those who believe a system that takes into account financial differences is more sustainable. If average families are not allocated the majority of funding for higher education, then they may not be able to attend these schools at all. This risk does not exist for the more affluent. Over time, this could have dire society. The general populace might feel that upward social mobility is nearly impossible and become demotivated. They may also begin to resent the government and higher classes, creating the conditions for social unrest.

In conclusion, despite calls for fairness under the law, certain distinctions should be made for the betterment of society on the whole. Government policy should be aimed at equality of opportunity rather than a reductive understanding of equality.

Overall assessment

Why this response received Band 7.0

The response develops a reasoned preference for funding according to financial need, using a relevant counterargument about wealthy taxpayers and a clear discussion of social mobility. Its vocabulary and sentence structures are varied. The main limitation is that the introduction does not distinguish access as a right from free tuition for everyone. The body also needs to explain the resource constraint that makes targeted support preferable, since universal free tuition would cover poorer students too.

IELTS criteria

How each score was decided

TR Task Response

6.5

The body supports funding according to financial need and develops a relevant taxpayer-fairness counterargument. However, the introduction blurs disagreement with universal free tuition and disagreement with access as a right, and the argument does not explain why universal funding would leave poorer students worse off.

CC Coherence and Cohesion

7.0

Ideas progress through a clear concession and rebuttal structure. The taxpayer argument is relevant, but its shift between taxpayers, families and students needs clearer reference, and the opening statement does not identify the funding policy as precisely as the body does.

LR Lexical Resource

7.5

Vocabulary is flexible and precise, with natural use of less common items such as 'socioeconomic background', 'dire ramifications' and 'reductive understanding', and only rare imprecision.

GRA Grammatical Range and Accuracy

7.0

A varied range of complex structures is used with generally good control. The doubled conjunction “unless if” is a clear local error, while most sentences remain grammatically controlled and easy to understand.