Children Spending Hours Daily on Smartphones

Some children spend hours every day on their smartphones. Why is this the case? Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Annotated response

11 correction notes

Showing 11 correction notes.

it is common to see children . This phenomenon has attracted both positive and negative opinions from various individuals. This essay will explore the reasons why this is happening and argue that it is more of a negative development.

One reason why children spend many hours on their smartphones is their easy access to social media. Social media platforms such as Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram to connect with their peers and share their daily experiences. They can and videos, and this gives them a sense of belonging and . This can be positive in some instances, but it can be harmful to a great extent as children can be exposed to cyberbullying, inappropriate content, and even addiction to social media.

Another reason why children spend many hours on their smartphones is the availability of entertainment options. Children can download games, music, and movies on their smartphones and spend several hours watching, listening, or playing. This may be perceived as positive , but it can be highly negative as it takes away the time that should be spent on other activities such as homework, sports, or socializing with friends.

Considering the effects of this trend, we can say that it is a negative development as it can expose children to to social media, and can distract them from important academic and skill development activities.

In conclusion, children spending long hours on their smartphones is a negative development. Although there are some benefits such as staying connected with peers , the negative impacts outweigh the positive ones. It is crucial for parents and guardians to monitor their children's smartphone use and ensure that they spend enough time on activities that promote their growth and development.

Overall assessment

Why this response received Band 6.5

The response fully answers both parts of the task with a clear position that the trend is negative and coherent paragraph-level organisation. Its main limitation is repetitive, under-developed support, with ideas about cyberbullying and distraction restated rather than extended or evidenced.

IELTS criteria

How each score was decided

Task Response

6.5

Both questions are addressed with a clear negative position and relevant reasons, but main ideas remain somewhat undeveloped and conclusions about harm are asserted rather than fully extended.

Coherence and Cohesion

6.5

Progression is broadly clear with logical paragraphing and linking devices, though cohesion is at times mechanical and ideas are repeated across paragraphs rather than advanced.

Lexical Resource

6.5

Vocabulary is adequate for the topic with some appropriate collocations such as sense of belonging and inappropriate content, but range is limited and phrasing is occasionally imprecise, as in perceived as positive on the ground.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy

6.5

Sentence structures show a mix of simple and complex forms with reasonable accuracy, but coordination is often faulty, including comma splices such as chat, and share photos and videos, and this gives, and variety is limited.