Telling Children They Can Achieve Anything

The essay addresses both sides and gives relevant examples of neglected friendships and university admission. The advantages are less fully supported: the links to self-discipline, gratitude and humility need more explanation.

Paragraphs clearly separate the advantages and disadvantages, and sequencing is easy to follow. Repeated reason labels are less precise than benefit labels here, and the move from appreciation to gratitude needs a clearer logical link.

Vocabulary is varied, with apt expressions such as goal-oriented and engrossed in studies. Some choices need greater precision, including educate children to try hard and self-deprecating behaviors for harmful self-blame.

A wide range of complex structures is used with good control, including conditionals and relative clauses, despite some awkward constructions such as inconsistent pronoun use with one.

The response addresses all parts of the question, presents a clear balanced position, and supports each main idea with relevant explanation and examples, though development is competent rather than fully extended.

Ideas progress logically across clearly organised paragraphs with appropriate linking devices, although cohesion is at times somewhat mechanical and predictable.

Vocabulary is sufficiently flexible and precise, with good use of topic-related terms such as growth mindset, resilience, and unrealistic expectations, alongside only occasional awkward phrasing.

A range of complex structures, including conditionals and relative clauses, is used with good control, and errors are minor and do not impede understanding.

The response addresses both parts of the question directly, presents clear main ideas on confidence and unrealistic expectations, and supports them with relevant explanation, though development is somewhat general rather than fully extended.

Ideas progress logically through clear paragraphs and a balanced conclusion. Some links remain general: the final drawback sentence begins with an imprecise “This,” and the introduction repeats its promise to discuss both sides.

Vocabulary includes relevant terms such as resilience, self-efficacy and a growth mindset. Precision could improve where these are grouped as “skills,” and phrases such as “a sense of self-confidence” could be more concise.

A variety of complex structures, including conditionals and relative clauses, is used with generally good control, and errors are rare and non-impeding.

Both sides are clearly addressed with relevant examples, but the claim that artistic ability cannot be acquired through practice is too absolute, and the emotional consequences need fuller explanation.

The two-sided paragraph structure is clear and ideas generally progress logically. The move from misdirected effort to emotional harm is abrupt, and the final reference to undesirable outcomes is vague.

Vocabulary is flexible and precise, with natural collocations such as innate talents, breed frustration, and undesirable outcomes, and only rare imprecision.

A wide range of complex structures is used with strong control, and errors are rare and non-impeding.

Both sides and a clear position are present. The disadvantage is explained through self-blame, but the celebrity list does not establish the message’s benefits, and claims about every child and the majority are insufficiently supported.

Ideas progress logically through clear paragraphs with effective referencing and cohesive devices, though transitions within paragraphs occasionally feel dense or compressed.

Vocabulary is broad, with effective expressions such as a complex interplay and sheer determination. However, delusions of grandeur conflicts with the account of self-doubt, and transcendent fame is imprecise in this context.

Complex conditional, relative and coordinated structures show strong control. Repeated spaces before commas and full stops detract from punctuation accuracy, while some crowded constructions would benefit from clearer phrasing.