Music Bringing Different Cultures and Ages Together

Some people say that music is a good way of bringing people of different cultures and ages together. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

12 sample answers, estimated Band 6.0–8.0. Your turn?

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Essay ideas: Music Bringing Different Cultures and Ages Together

WhyThis is anOpinion essay — it asks whether you agree or disagree with a statement.

SoWe split the ideas intoReasons to agree(supports the statement)andReasons to disagree(argues against it).

Reasons to agree

6 ideas

Reasons to disagree

5 ideas

Same question · Different responses

Sample responses and feedback

Response 01

Must fixSuggested

Essay · 349 words · 4 paragraphs · 20 comments

Score details

Response 01
Estimated band6.0/ 9

Overall assessment

The response presents a clear position and addresses both cultural and generational dimensions of the prompt with relevant if loosely developed examples. Its main limitation is imprecise, sometimes awkward phrasing and mechanical linking that weaken the clarity and persuasiveness of otherwise well-organised ideas.

TR

Task Response

The position of complete agreement is clear and maintained, both cultures and ages are covered with relevant examples, but ideas remain somewhat underdeveloped and the example about the farmers' agitation is only loosely connected to cross-cultural unity.

6.5
CC

Coherence and Cohesion

Progression through an introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion is clear, yet cohesion is mechanical with formulaic linkers and occasional illogical connections between sentences.

6.0
LR

Lexical Resource

There is adequate range with some idiomatic attempts, but frequent awkward or inaccurate collocations such as 'unites the people', 'oldsters', and 'establish good bands' reduce precision.

6.0
GRA

Grammatical Range and Accuracy

A mix of simple and complex structures is used with generally clear meaning, though recurring grammatical errors such as 'having different age groups' and 'having sympathy for others make them lovable' are noticeable.

6.0

What to work on next

Develop supporting examples with more precise, concrete explanation and replace stock idiomatic phrases with accurate natural wording to strengthen clarity throughout.

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Useful vocabulary: Music Bringing Different Cultures and Ages Together

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Sentence patterns: Music Bringing Different Cultures and Ages Together

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Part 2

You should spend about 40 minutes on this task. Write at least 250 words.

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