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Advantages and Disadvantages of Peer Pressure on Youth

Young people are often influenced in their behaviors and situations by others in the same age group. This is called “peer pressure”.

Do the disadvantages of peer pressure outweigh the advantages?

2 sample answers, estimated Band 7.0–8.0. Your turn?

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From essays on this question

Essay ideas: Advantages and Disadvantages of Peer Pressure on Youth

WhyThis is anAdvantages and disadvantages essay — it asks you to weigh the benefits and drawbacks of something.

SoWe split the ideas intoAdvantages(benefits)andDisadvantages(drawbacks).

Advantages

2 ideas

Disadvantages

4 ideas

Same question · Different responses

Sample responses and feedback

Response 01

Must fixSuggested

Essay · 281 words · 4 paragraphs · 12 comments

Score details

Response 01
Estimated band7.0/ 9

Overall assessment

The response presents a clear position and develops both sides of the argument with a relevant example, showing strong organization and ambition in language use. The main limitation is that the supporting evidence, particularly the Japan suicide statistic, is not tightly connected to peer pressure, and some word choices are imprecise despite generally flexible grammar.

TR

Task Response

The response addresses all parts of the question, states a clear position, and extends main ideas with explanations and examples, though the Japan statistic is only loosely linked to peer pressure.

7.0
CC

Coherence and Cohesion

Clear paragraphs and connectives give the argument a logical progression. Referencing is occasionally ambiguous, as “they” may mean the peers or their counterparts, and the conclusion would synthesize the argument more clearly by explicitly restating which side outweighs the other.

7.0
LR

Lexical Resource

Vocabulary is flexible and ambitious with less common items like 'self-distancing' and 'detrimental', though occasional imprecise collocations such as 'paramount consideration should be taken into account towards' reduce precision.

7.0
GRA

Grammatical Range and Accuracy

A wide range of complex structures is used with generally good control and punctuation, with only occasional non-impeding errors.

7.0

What to work on next

Tie supporting examples more directly to peer pressure so that each piece of evidence clearly illustrates the argument being made.

From essays on this question

Useful vocabulary: Advantages and Disadvantages of Peer Pressure on Youth

From essays on this question

Sentence patterns: Advantages and Disadvantages of Peer Pressure on Youth

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Part 2

You should spend about 40 minutes on this task. Write at least 250 words.

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