Technology and the Gap Between Rich and Poor

Some people believe the range of technology available to individuals today is increasing the gap between poor people and rich people. Others think it is having an opposite effect. Discuss both of these points of view. What is your opinion on that issue?

Annotated response

4 correction notes

Showing 4 correction notes.

Technology seems to promise infinite benefits for mankind. While it could be argued that the development of new technology always expands the gap between rich and poor, it is also true that the in developing countries and low-income countries over the last few years and this has helped to bridge the gap between the rich and the poor. So, both views have some ground which I shall be discussing in this essay.

There are many reasons why people say that technology increases the gap between rich and poor. To begin with, new technology itself tends to be the richer elements of society and the poorer elements are denied the opportunities that this provides, such as the ability to be able to train for better paid work. It is understandable that because of their ability to acquire new technology, the learning ability within the richer elements of society is much improved. Therefore they get better job placements and continue to grow further.

Overall assessment

Why this response received Band 6.5

The strongest aspect is the fluent, controlled language, which features precise vocabulary and varied sentence structures with only occasional minor errors. The main limitation is that the response is significantly under length and only partially developed: the second viewpoint and the writer's own opinion are announced but never delivered, leaving the argument incomplete.

IELTS criteria

How each score was decided

Task Response

5.0

The response addresses the topic and signals a position, but it is 75 words below the minimum length, develops only one of the two required viewpoints, and never delivers the opinion or conclusion it promises, so the task is only partially covered.

Coherence and Cohesion

6.0

Paragraphing is logical and cohesive devices such as 'to begin with' and 'therefore' are used naturally, but the argument stops mid-development without a second body paragraph or conclusion, leaving the overall progression incomplete.

Lexical Resource

7.0

Vocabulary is flexible and precise, with phrases like 'expands the gap', 'denied the opportunities', and 'better paid work' conveying ideas accurately and with some sophistication.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy

7.0

Sentence structures are varied and largely accurate, including complex constructions with subordinate clauses, with only occasional awkwardness or minor error that does not impede meaning.