School teachers are commonly believed to play a more influential role than parents in how intelligent children become and how they develop socially. This belief is, in actual fact, quite convincing. Admittedly, there are some people who might believe that parental influence on children’s smartness is essential. This is understandable in that parents normally know their kids better than anyone else and for them to develop their intelligence. However, it is unquestionably clear that school teachers play a pivotal role in children’s development in terms of intelligence and social interaction. Firstly, without schooling, a kid could not become knowledgeable in the strictest sense of the term. Teachers in the school context would turn even the most retarded student in the world into a knowledgeable one, contributing significantly to the modern concept of the so-called Secondly, it is teachers that are able to provide children with a wide range of skills through repeated practice. Learning each and every new skill will help make the brain better developed, resulting in higher intelligence. Last but not least, a school is far better than a home when social encounters are considered. Going to school, children have chances to interact with their teachers, their friends and others on a daily basis, thereby easily building up and expanding their social relationships. A school is like a small society.In conclusion, for the reasons mentioned above – knowledge, skills, and social encounters, it is indisputable that parents cannot be compared with school teachers when it comes to the development of children’s smartness and social relationships.
Teachers vs Parents Influence on Child Development
Once children start school, teachers have more influence on their intellectual and social development than parents. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?
Annotated response
2 correction notes
Overall assessment
Why this response received Band 6.5
The response presents a clear and consistently maintained position with several relevant supporting ideas, showing the strongest performance in task coverage and organisation. The main limitation is the use of overstated, imprecise, and occasionally inappropriate wording, alongside repeated sweeping claims that weaken the persuasiveness of the argument.
IELTS criteria
How each score was decided
Task Response
6.5The position is clear and consistently developed across relevant main ideas on knowledge, skills, and social interaction, though several claims are overgeneralised and insufficiently supported or illustrated.
Coherence and Cohesion
6.5Progression is broadly logical with clear paragraphing and sequencing devices, but linking is at times mechanical and some transitions and paragraph boundaries are handled awkwardly.
Lexical Resource
6.0There is adequate range of less common vocabulary, but noticeable imprecision and poor collocation, such as 'smartness', 'facilitate various conditions', and the offensive and inappropriate use of 'retarded', reduce accuracy and appropriacy.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
7.0Complex structures, including cleft sentences, relative clauses and participial constructions, are used with generally good control. The quotation beginning multiple intelligences is not closed, and society.In lacks a separating space. These are specific punctuation and presentation slips rather than a recurring pattern of article or agreement errors.