Sample response & feedback

Sharing Information in Research and Business

Question

Some people believe that it is good to share as much information as possible in scientific research, business, and the academic world. Others believe that some information is too important or too valuable to be shared freely. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Annotated response

12 correction notes

Showing 12 correction notes.

In today's world, information is a powerful tool that drives innovation, research, business, trade, and academic progress. While some people believe that certain information should be kept confidential or hidden from all, I firmly believe that it is important to share as much information as possible scientific research, business, and the academic world. This essay attempts to discuss both views first, and then explain the reason behind my view.

Those who oppose the idea of sharing information without any restrictions say that granting unrestricted access to all sensitive information can have catastrophic consequences. It can lead to a breach of national security, privacy and trade secrets. This can have such a severe outcome that the government may collapse. Such unrestricted access to valuable information can compromise the nation's ability to from terrorist attacks and keep reaping benefits from research and manufacturing work.

Those who advocate for sharing as much information as possible opine that it leads to greater innovation and progress. When researchers and scientists share their findings and discoveries, other experts in the field can . This leads to a faster and more efficient pace of progress, which benefits society as a whole. For example, the discovery of the structure of DNA by James Watson and Francis Crick in 1953 revolutionized the field of genetics and has led to countless breakthroughs in medical research, they freely shared their findings. Sharing information is important also because it promotes transparency and honesty. In the business world, companies that are open and honest about their practices and products are more likely to build trust with their customers and gain a positive reputation. This is because people appreciate transparency and want to know what they are investing in or buying. For instance, Tesla's decision to make its electric car patents available for free to anyone who wants to use them has led to an increase in the number of electric cars on the market, ultimately helping to reduce carbon emissions and protect the environment.

In conclusion, it is important to share as much information as possible in scientific research, business, and the academic world. Sharing information promotes innovation, transparency, and the democratization of knowledge, ultimately leading to a more prosperous and equitable society.

Overall assessment

Why this response received Band 7.0

The response communicates a clear preference and develops several relevant benefits, particularly research collaboration and business transparency. Its main limitation is the uneven reasoning: the restriction argument jumps to government collapse, while the DNA and Tesla examples make broad causal claims. The conclusion would be stronger if it explained why the benefits justify the preference despite the risks already identified.

IELTS criteria

How each score was decided

TR Task Response

6.5

Both views are addressed and the position is clear. The restriction argument relies on an unexplained government-collapse claim, while the conclusion does not explain how the benefits of sharing justify the preference despite the risks identified.

CC Coherence and Cohesion

7.0

Ideas are organised into logical paragraphs and progression is generally clear, though the argument relies on simple pro/con sequencing and the transition between the two perspectives and the opinion is somewhat mechanical.

LR Lexical Resource

7.0

Vocabulary has good range, including “catastrophic consequences” and “transparency”. Precision is occasionally reduced by awkward combinations such as “substantial sectors” and the use of “a breach of” with “trade secrets”.

GRA Grammatical Range and Accuracy

7.0

A variety of complex structures and subordination is used accurately across the response, with only occasional awkward or wordy constructions that do not impede meaning.