Corporate Sponsorship of Sports

Many companies sponsor sports as a way to advertise themselves. Some people think this is good for the world of sports, while others think there are disadvantages of this. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

Annotated response

3 correction notes

Showing 3 correction notes.

Corporate sponsorship in sports is a common trend in modern times. Many indicate that it is a good trend, while others are of the opinion that there are drawbacks to this. This essay will discuss both points of view and argue in favour of the benefits of brands sponsoring sports.

On the one hand, when a company sponsors sports and individual athletes, it can increase interference. That is to say that the company often expects favour and if the event is sponsored by a big company, then it is likely that they will try to interfere . They, for instance, want to arrange the schedule of the tournament according to their design or shoot advertisements with athletes in the middle of the event, which in turn, translates the tournament into a marketing event.

On the other hand, without sponsorship from companies, many sporting events may not take place. It is difficult for many organizers to meet expenditures, so it is important that companies assist these events so that they can continue to entertain the public. For example, there are many events like the Olympics or World Cup Football which would not be successful without the funding of big corporations. Moreover, corporate sponsorships are crucial for attracting young talents and building more sports facilities all around the country. Without their money and support, among young people would have been much more difficult.

In my opinion, I feel that financing sports by companies and big brands is a positive trend. This is because sponsorship . In simple words, sponsors often provide athletes with clothing and equipment free of charge for advertising purposes.

In conclusion, corporate sports sponsorship has both positive and negative aspects. However, after a thorough analysis of both sides, I believe that sponsorship is a positive trend because it reaps advantages for both parties and spreads the popularity of sports all around the world.

Overall assessment

Why this response received Band 7.0

The strongest aspect is the clear, well-organised coverage of both views with a consistent opinion supported by relevant examples such as the Olympics. The main limitation is the slightly uneven development, particularly the brief and somewhat thin treatment of the writer's own view and the disadvantages paragraph's tendency toward assertion rather than explanation.

IELTS criteria

How each score was decided

Task Response

7.0

The response addresses all parts of the task, discusses both views and presents a clear, consistent opinion, though some ideas such as the disadvantage of interference could be extended further.

Coherence and Cohesion

7.0

The essay is logically organised with clear paragraphing and a range of cohesive devices, although linking is at times slightly mechanical, as in the formulaic opening and conclusion.

Lexical Resource

7.0

Vocabulary is sufficiently flexible and mostly precise, with phrases like 'mutual benefit' and 'attracting young talents', but there are occasional awkward collocations such as 'increase interference' and 'reaps advantages'.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy

7.0

A variety of complex structures is used with generally good control, and errors are minor and non-impeding, though some constructions such as 'translates the tournament into a marketing event' are strained.