Letter of Complaint About an Unrepaired Mobile Phone

You have bought a new mobile phone and in a few days after purchase it has stopped working. You spoken to the company representative a week ago but the phone has still not been repaired. Write a letter to the company. In your letter – introduce yourself – explain the situation – say what action you would like to company to take.

Annotated response

1 correction note

Showing 1 correction note.

Dear Sir or Madam, Two weeks ago I purchased a brand new mobile phone from your shop. I was excited to have purchased it but very disappointed to find that the phone was poorly produced and stopped working within a week of purchase. I have talked to one of your representatives over the phone twice but nothing has been done so far. I am hoping you will replace it immediately. In relation to the specifics of the order, I purchased this mobile phone from your Davidsons Avenue store on September 23rd and it was a cash purchase. The model of the mobile phone is the OnePlus 12R and it comes with a 6.78-inch display, Android 14 (OxygenOS 14) OS, 50 Megapixel camera, 16 GB RAM and a Qualcomm Snapdragon 8 Gen 2 processor. The order number is 25009652 and I am attaching a copy of my receipt.

The issue with the phone is that I am unable to start it even after the phone is fully charged. It is dead and unusable for me. I’m sure this is a manufacturing flaw and I am entitled to get a new phone as a replacement according to the warranty policy. Despite my communication with one of your representatives a week ago, nothing has been done and I seriously doubt the after-sale service you provide. As a solution, and because I really like the functionality and features of this phone, I am hoping that you will agree to replace it with a new one immediately. Otherwise, I would like a full refund and I will be contacting the Bureau of Consumer Protection if I do not hear back from you in regards to this within a week. Thank you for giving the matter your attention and I hope to hear your reply soon. Yours faithfully, David Miller

Overall assessment

Why this response received Band 7.5

The letter clearly explains the problem and asks for a replacement or refund. The account of previous contact is consistent. Its main weakness is the lengthy technical specification and crowded paragraph organisation, which distract from the fault, unsuccessful follow-up and requested action.

IELTS criteria

How each score was decided

Task Achievement

7.0

The letter explains the purchase, the fault, previous contact and the requested replacement or refund. Saying that contact occurred twice and mentioning contact a week ago is consistent. The customer is introduced through purchase details, while the long technical specification contributes little to explaining the fault.

Coherence and Cohesion

7.0

The complaint has two main paragraphs and a broadly clear sequence. However, the opening combines the initial complaint with a long product specification, and the second paragraph combines the fault, follow-up, requested remedy and closing. More focused grouping would improve readability.

Lexical Resource

8.0

Vocabulary is flexible and precise, with natural collocations such as 'manufacturing flaw', 'entitled to a replacement', and 'after-sale service' used appropriately for a formal complaint.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy

7.5

Complex clauses, passive constructions and the conditional deadline are generally controlled. The phrase the phone was poorly produced is grammatically valid, although it is broad and less informative than the specific description of the phone failing to start.