Reasons and Solutions for Buying Too Many Clothes

In some parts of the world, people buy far too many clothes. What are the reasons for this? How can people be persuaded to reduce the number of clothes they buy?

Annotated response

20 correction notes

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In some parts of the world, people buy far too many clothes. So here are some possible reasons for this, so much on fashion.

of people in some parts of the world is not new. Firstly, I feel one of the causes of this is social media. A lot of persons, influenced by what they see on the Internet. They get inspired by their favourite celebrities, and most of them are eager to copy what they do . So this inflates the . Secondly, every individual has a different they need to dress impressively to attract the kind of they desire. how they spend money on clothing.

However, I feel there is a need to control this trend out of hand especially . I realised with are practicing this lifestyle. , to . For example, my neighbour's son used his pocket money to acquire instead of food. I think the government needs to find ways to . The appropriate authorities should set up an investment program for teenagers. Additionally, parents should pay close attention to , and endeavour to know their help keep them in check.

I hope my reasons and the recommendations help reduce the amount of money spent on clothes in some parts of the world.

Overall assessment

Why this response received Band 6.0

The response addresses both parts of the question with relevant ideas and a concrete personal example, which is its strongest aspect. The main limitation is frequent grammatical inaccuracy and a somewhat informal, unevenly developed style that weakens the overall persuasiveness.

IELTS criteria

How each score was decided

Task Response

6.0

Both questions are answered with a clear position and relevant causes and solutions, supported by a specific example, though ideas are developed unevenly and the closing paragraph adds little substance.

Coherence and Cohesion

6.0

Progression is broadly clear with paragraphing by task part and basic linkers, but some connectives are misused, such as 'Meanwhile' and 'However', and cohesion relies on simple sequencing.

Lexical Resource

6.0

Vocabulary is adequate for the topic with some appropriate items like 'stable income' and 'lifestyle', but word choice is sometimes imprecise, for example 'fabrics' for clothes and 'persons' for people.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy

5.5

A mix of simple and complex structures is attempted, but frequent errors in agreement, prepositions, and punctuation, such as 'it impact', 'before it get', and comma splices, occasionally reduce clarity.