Sample response & feedback

Government Action Against Overusing Natural Resources

Question

The overuse of natural resources causes an ultimate exhaust of them. People have been using them to be in the swim of new styles such as making new furniture of recent design. This causes a huge harm to the environment. Therefore, the government should discourage people the overuse of these resources. To what extent do you support or oppose the idea?

Annotated response

24 correction notes

Showing 24 correction notes.

People have overused natural resources in the last few decades. In fact, humans have used them for unimportant things, such as for luxurious furniture or motor racing. Consequently, it has given negative impact the environment. For that reason, governments must persuade the public not to overuse the resources. I totally agree with the statement and the following essay will .

It is a fact that the main threat to the environment is the human being. Mankind has overexploited natural resources serious damage to the earth. Firstly, people have logged the extinction of many unique animals. Pathetically, some of the timbers were not used for human's basic urgent needs, but they were utilised for the purpose of fancy and luxurious things. Secondly, with , people have used oil as their main . People become more dependent on this energy, as the demand for the oil kept on increasing in the past few years, and it is forecasted to increase more in the future. Many people do not realise that the have caused catastrophic , such as global warming. Besides that, it is reported that many have caused to their surrounding areas.

Therefore, governments should take some this problem. One of the steps that the government could do is by switching the type of energy. They could do extensive research on safer energy resources such as the windmill or the solar power; therefore these energies could substitute the fossil fuel types. Besides that, governments should , regarding the usage of timber. And then luxurious furniture should be charged with high tax rates and people should be encouraged to use electronic paper and reduce the usage of paper. By doing these kinds of things, it is hoped that it could recover the environment.

In conclusion, it is true that people have harmed the environment by over-exploiting the natural resources. Forests have been destroyed and the ozone layer has been damaged due to . In my opinion, I strongly agree that governments should take some , as the overuse of natural resources would be a serious threat for the future generation.

Overall assessment

Why this response received Band 6.5

The response presents a clear, consistent position with well-organized paragraphs and relevant supporting examples such as deforestation and fossil fuel consumption. Its strongest aspect is the logical structure and developed ideas; the main limitation is recurring grammatical inaccuracy and some awkward or imprecise word choices that occasionally reduce clarity.

IELTS criteria

How each score was decided

TR Task Response

7.0

The response addresses the task directly with a clear, consistently maintained position, well-developed main ideas, and relevant supporting examples such as logging, fossil fuels, taxation, and alternative energy.

CC Coherence and Cohesion

7.0

Ideas are logically organized across clear paragraphs with a logical progression, though some cohesive devices such as 'And then' and 'Besides that' are used mechanically.

LR Lexical Resource

6.0

The response shows an adequate range of vocabulary for the topic, but imprecise or awkward expressions such as “fumes of this energy”, “oil mining plants” and “recover the environment” reduce precision.

GRA Grammatical Range and Accuracy

6.0

A mix of simple and complex sentence forms is used with some variety, but frequent errors in articles, verb forms, and adjective use, such as 'given negative impact the environment' and 'serious damaged', occasionally impede precision.