Unpaid Community Work Instead of Prison for Prisoners

Some people think certain prisoners should be made to do unpaid community work instead of being put behind bars. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Annotated response

3 correction notes

Showing 3 correction notes.

Crimes, in many countries, have gone beyond the tolerable rate, and it is a common practice to incarcerate convicted people. A segment of society opines that not all crimes are equal and the repercussion of harsh sentences for all offences is uncivilised. They outline the need for unpaid community service as punishment for mild offenders and youngsters, and I also believe that certain offenders should be given non-custodial sentences.

The predominant reason for me to believe in like cleaning streets, planting trees, and working for charity instead of the prison sentence is that many offenders are not born criminals, and circumstances often push them to commit a transgression. When such unpremeditated convicts are expelled from society, they incline to re-offend in isolation as there is none to accept them. In a similar fashion, juvenile delinquents should be rehabilitated by community services, and not put them behind bars with other serious criminals. A recent study reveals that many youngsters who had been in prison for a long time often end up becoming even bigger criminals.

Moreover, one of the main objectives of our justice system is to control the crime rate and let offenders come clean. So if we give mild offenders , they would never get the chance to transform themselves. The unpaid community services, unlike harsh prison sentences, let offenders repent for their crimes, get close to other people and understand the essence of good deeds. To illustrate, around 80% of people who had to take part in cleaning and taking care of elderly people as part of their first-time small violations of laws in the state of California said that it positively impacted their view on crimes and changed their mentality. The same can not be said for the people who are put behind bars.

To recapitulate, minor misconduct should be treated differently than serious offences and thus deserves different punishments like unpaid community work. The objective of the law is to maintain peace in society, not to punish people. Thus unpaid community service is a great option to let some convicted lament their crime, do something good for society, and transform into good citizens.

Overall assessment

Why this response received Band 7.0

The response presents a clear, consistent position supported by relevant reasons, examples, and a logical paragraph structure, which is its strongest aspect. The main limitation is recurring grammatical inaccuracy in complex sentences, alongside occasional awkward or imprecise word choices that slightly reduce fluency.

IELTS criteria

How each score was decided

Task Response

7.0

The response directly answers the question with a clear agreement position, develops two well-supported main ideas about rehabilitation and transformation, and uses relevant examples, though some supporting detail is generalized rather than fully developed.

Coherence and Cohesion

7.0

Ideas are organized logically across clear paragraphs with appropriate cohesive devices such as 'Moreover' and 'To illustrate', although linking is occasionally mechanical and progression within paragraphs could be smoother.

Lexical Resource

7.0

There is a good range of topic-related vocabulary including 'incarcerate', 'transgression', 'juvenile delinquents', and 'non-custodial sentences', but some phrases like 'incline to re-offend in isolation' and 'let convicted lament' show imprecise or unnatural usage.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy

7.0

Complex structures are used with generally good control, but some constructions are inaccurate. In "juvenile delinquents should be rehabilitated ... and not put them behind bars", the second part does not maintain the passive structure. It could read "and should not be put behind bars". The pattern "let offenders repent" is grammatical.