Alternative Medicine Instead of Usual Doctors

Nowadays, a growing number of people with health problems are trying alternative medicines and treatments instead of visiting their usual doctor. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Annotated response

5 correction notes

Showing 5 correction notes.

In recent years, there has been a noticeable increase in the number of individuals with health problems turning to alternative medicines and treatments traditional medical care. This trend raises the question of whether this shift towards alternative medicine is a positive or negative development. In this essay, I will present my viewpoint that it is a positive development.

One major positive aspect of individuals opting for alternative medicines and treatments is the emphasis on holistic and natural approaches to healthcare. Alternative medicine often focuses on treating the root cause of ailments rather than merely addressing symptoms. Practices such as herbal remedies, acupuncture, and meditation are believed to promote overall well-being and balance in the body. For instance, many who suffer from chronic headaches decide to explore alternative medicine instead of relying solely on painkillers to alleviate the symptoms. The holistic approach of alternative medicines often them a more comprehensive and long-lasting their well-being beyond the immediate ailment.

Moreover, alternative medicines give individuals a sense of control over their health, empowering them to actively participate in their own healing process. An example of this is mindfulness meditation, a popular alternative practice that focuses on training the mind to cultivate awareness and reduce stress. By incorporating mindfulness into their daily routine, individuals can take an active role in managing their mental and emotional well-being.

In conclusion, the growing interest in alternative medicines and treatments can be seen as a positive development in healthcare. It highlights individuals' desire for holistic approaches and greater involvement in their own well-being.

Overall assessment

Why this response received Band 7.0

The strongest aspect of this response is its clear, consistent position that alternative medicine is a positive development, supported by two relevantly developed main ideas with concrete examples. The main limitation is that the support remains somewhat general, and minor language slips such as spelling and subject-verb agreement slightly reduce precision.

IELTS criteria

How each score was decided

Task Response

7.0

The response addresses all parts of the task with a clear, consistently maintained position that the trend is positive, presenting two developed main ideas with relevant examples, though the support is somewhat general in places.

Coherence and Cohesion

7.0

The essay is logically organised with a clear progression through introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion, and cohesive devices are used appropriately, though linking is at times formulaic.

Lexical Resource

7.0

There is a sufficient range of topic-related vocabulary, including phrases like holistic approaches and empowering individuals, with generally good control, though occasional slips such as poeple and some repetition are present.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy

7.0

A variety of complex structures is used with good flexibility and generally strong accuracy, with minor non-impeding errors such as subject-verb agreement in alternative medicines often offer and a missing comma before enhancing.