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澳大利亚的两条公路隧道

Two Road Tunnels in Australia

The diagrams below give information about two road tunnels in two Australian cities.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

下图提供了关于澳大利亚两座城市中两条公路隧道的信息。

请选择并报告主要特征来概括信息,并在相关之处进行比较。

2 篇范文估分 7.0–8.0,换你来写?

先自己写,再往下看范文和批改,差距一眼就能看出来。

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来自本题范文

要点:澳大利亚的两条公路隧道

为什么这是地图 ,要求你描述一个地方发生了哪些变化。

所以我们把要点分为概述(这个地方的整体变化)和主要变化(新增、拆除、移动或保留了什么)。

概述

2个要点

主要变化

6个要点

同一道题 · 不同范文

范文与批改

范文 01

必改建议

作文 · 167词 · 3段 · 10条批注

分数详情

范文 01
估算分数7.0/ 9

总体评价

The response organises the comparison clearly and reports useful details about cost, length, ground materials and lane capacity. However, the first construction end date is 1998, not 1988. Claims about advanced technology, the traffic-opening date and the tunnel matching the bridge span go beyond the diagram. The language shows structural variety, but more precise descriptions of location and lane arrangement would improve the report.

TA

任务完成情况

The response reports the main dimensions, costs, terrain and lane totals, but gives the first construction period as 1986–1988 instead of 1986–1998. The overview and final sentence infer advanced building technology without visual evidence, while an opening date and matching bridge endpoints are also not established.

7.0
CC

连贯与衔接

Ideas are organised logically into an overview followed by two body sections, with cohesive devices and referencing used naturally and without strain.

7.0
LR

词汇丰富度

Vocabulary supports comparisons through expressions such as 'accommodate' and 'longer than the former tunnel'. Some choices reduce precision: 'river-spanning' obscures the tunnel's position beneath the river, 'went' is awkward for a fixed structure, and 'construction cost' would identify the expenditure more directly than 'price tag'.

7.0
GRA

语法多样性与准确性

A wide range of complex structures, including relative clauses and cleft-like emphasis ('it was not until 2006 that'), is used with consistent accuracy and only occasional slips.

7.0

下一步改进重点

Check the construction dates, replace technology judgments with measurable comparisons, and report completion periods without assuming opening dates. Describe the lanes per bore and use static location verbs such as lies.

来自本题范文

实用词汇:澳大利亚的两条公路隧道

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第1部分

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