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1985年至2010年中国的食品消费

Food Consumption in China Between 1985 and 2010

The graph below shows the changes in food consumption by Chinese people between 1985 and 2010.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

下图显示了1985年至2010年中国人食品消费的变化。

请选择并报告主要特征来概括信息,并在相关之处进行比较。

2 篇范文估分 7.0–7.5,换你来写?

先自己写,再往下看范文和批改,差距一眼就能看出来。

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来自本题范文

要点:1985年至2010年中国的食品消费

为什么这是折线图 ,要求你描述随时间变化的主要趋势和变化。

所以我们把要点分为概述(整个时期的主要趋势)和要点(值得描述的数据和对比)。

概述

3个要点

要点

4个要点

同一道题 · 不同范文

范文与批改

范文 01

必改建议

作文 · 165词 · 4段 · 13条批注

分数详情

范文 01
估算分数7.0/ 9

总体评价

The response describes all three series and identifies the highest consumption and the final equality of salt and meat. Most figures are reasonable readings of the graph, but the remaining period after 1995 is 15 years, and meat levels off after 2005. The overview would be stronger with the main directions of change. Several awkward collocations and passive constructions also need attention.

TA

任务完成情况

The response covers all three series, gives generally reasonable figures and notes the final equality of salt and meat. Its overview identifies rankings and endpoints but omits the main directions. The period after 1995 is miscounted as ten years, and the description of meat obscures the plateau after 2005.

7.0
CC

连贯与衔接

The introduction, starting figures, subsequent changes and final overview create a clear sequence. Some linking is mechanical: "However" at the start of the trend paragraph implies a contrast with the initial figures that is not established, while "In contrast" would better link falling salt consumption to rising meat consumption.

7.0
LR

词汇丰富度

Vocabulary is flexible enough for the task with terms such as 'fluctuated', 'climbed steadily', and 'downward tendency', despite some imprecise collocations like 'grew up gradually' and 'related figure'.

7.0
GRA

语法多样性与准确性

A good range of structures is demonstrated, including relative clauses and participial phrases such as 'peaking at 850 grams', with only minor errors that do not impede meaning.

7.0

下一步改进重点

Correct the 1995–2010 span to 15 years, distinguish the meat plateau after 2005, and add overall trend directions to the overview. Revise "grew up" and the passive comparison "were eaten the same amount".

来自本题范文

实用词汇:1985年至2010年中国的食品消费

来自本题范文

句型:1985年至2010年中国的食品消费

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写下你的作文

已加载题目:A类小作文。
第1部分

建议用时约 20 分钟,至少写 150 词。

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