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英国各年龄段的影院观影情况

Cinema Attendance by Age Group in the UK

The line graph below gives information on cinema attendance in the UK.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

下方折线图提供了英国的影院观影情况信息。

请选择并报告主要特征来概括信息,并在相关之处进行比较。

2 篇范文估分 6.0–6.5,换你来写?

先自己写,再往下看范文和批改,差距一眼就能看出来。

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范文 01

必改建议

作文 · 173词 · 1段 · 13条批注

分数详情

范文 01
估算分数6.0/ 9

总体评价

The response identifies the main pattern of the graph, namely that older age groups attended the cinema more, and it tracks changes over time with mostly accurate figures. However, it repeats ideas, blurs the age-group labels, and contains frequent grammatical and word-choice errors that reduce precision.

TA

任务完成情况

The response gives an overview that older groups attended more and reports several largely accurate figures, such as about 15% for the youngest group in 1990 and the 1995-2000 dip, but it restates the same features, conflates the 44-54 group with 'people over 40', and makes a vague average-increase claim, giving relevant coverage with some imprecision and repetition.

6.0
CC

连贯与衔接

Information is arranged in a broadly clear sequence and the writer uses basic linking devices, but the opening ideas are duplicated, referencing is sometimes loose, and the progression feels mechanical in places.

6.0
LR

词汇丰富度

Vocabulary is adequate for describing trends and proportions, with terms like 'increased gradually' and 'dominated', though awkward expressions such as 'trend to attend', 'attended in cinema', and 'cinema goer's number' show limited flexibility and occasional inaccuracy.

6.0
GRA

语法多样性与准确性

A mix of simple and complex structures is attempted, but errors are frequent, including 'more than 35% people over 40 years attended', faulty comparatives like 'increased by 5% ... than the percentages were in 2005', and article and preposition mistakes, although the intended meaning generally remains clear.

6.0

下一步改进重点

Remove repeated sentences, use the graph's exact age-group labels, and revise grammar so each data point is stated once and accurately.

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实用词汇:英国各年龄段的影院观影情况

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