年轻人到较贫穷国家做志愿者

Young People Volunteering in Poorer Countries

More and more young people from wealthy countries are spending a short time doing unpaid work, such as teaching and building houses for communities in poorer countries. What are the reasons for this? Who benefits more from this, the communities or these young people?

越来越多来自富裕国家的年轻人花短时间做无偿工作,例如为较贫穷国家的社区教书和建造房屋。这是出于什么原因?这对谁的益处更大,是这些社区还是这些年轻人?

来自本题范文

写作思路:年轻人到较贫穷国家做志愿者

为什么这是双问题类 ,要求你在一道题中回答两个不同的问题。

所以我们把思路分为问题 1(回答第一个问题)和问题 2(回答第二个问题)。

问题 1

7条思路

问题 2

5条思路

同一道题 · 不同范文

范文与批改

范文 01

必改建议

作文 · 264词 · 4段 · 12条批注

分数详情

范文 01
估算分数6.5/ 9

总体评价

The response explains a motivation for volunteering and describes gains for both young people and receiving communities. However, the conclusion says the benefits differ without clearly answering who gains more or arguing that they gain equally. Some broad claims, weak connections and inaccurate expressions reduce the precision of the discussion.

TR

任务回应

The response identifies kindness as a motivation and describes benefits for both groups. However, it concludes that they enjoy different benefits without clearly deciding which gains more or explaining that their benefits are equal. Some general claims also need fuller support.

6.0
CC

连贯与衔接

The response uses distinct paragraphs and has broadly understandable progression. Some connections are weak, particularly the therefore link from learning qualities outside a classroom to helping people, and the concluding comparison is introduced abruptly through a conversational question.

6.5
LR

词汇丰富度

Vocabulary is adequate for the topic, with expressions such as materialistic world and generous act. Precision is reduced by "who is more beneficial", which asks who provides benefits, and "developed countries" where the paragraph appears to mean the poorer countries receiving help.

6.5
GRA

语法多样性与准确性

Simple and complex sentences communicate the argument clearly, although errors such as "These acts ... constantly reminds" and the noun form "doing works" are noticeable. The embedded clause "how it benefits both parties" is grammatically valid.

6.5

下一步改进重点

Answer the comparative question explicitly: explain which group benefits more, or justify a view that their benefits are equal. Support that judgement by comparing the significance or lasting effects of the benefits already described.

来自本题范文

实用词汇:年轻人到较贫穷国家做志愿者

练习这道题

写下你的作文

已加载题目:大作文。
第2部分

建议用时约 40 分钟,至少写 250 词。

词数:040:00 输入第一个词后开始计时