写信给经理申请内部调换部门

Letter to Manager Requesting Internal Department Transfer

You started in your present job two years ago. You now feel it is important for your career development to move to a different department in the same company.

Write a letter to your manager. In your letter:

• say what you have learned in your present job

• suggest how the company would benefit from moving you to a different department

• explain why you do not wish to leave the company

Dear ……………………,

你两年前开始从事目前的工作。你现在觉得,为了职业发展,调到同一家公司的另一个部门很重要。

给你的经理写一封信。在信中:

• 说明你在目前的工作中学到了什么

• 建议公司把你调到另一个部门将如何受益

• 解释你为什么不想离开公司

Dear ……………………,

来自本题范文

书信要点:写信给经理申请内部调换部门

为什么这是半正式书信 ,要求你用礼貌、半正式的语气回应每个提示点。

所以我们按题目列出的每个提示点整理要点。

Say what you have learned in your present job

10个要点

Suggest how the company would benefit from moving you to a different department

6个要点

Explain why you do not wish to leave the company

10个要点

同一道题 · 不同范文

范文与批改

范文 01

必改建议

作文 · 185词 · 6段 · 18条批注

分数详情

范文 01
估算分数6.0/ 9

总体评价

The letter makes the transfer request clear and explains the writer's loyalty through the scholarship and internship history. It describes workplace experience, but leaves the learning implicit and does not clearly explain how the company would benefit from the move. Frequent grammatical and word-choice errors also make parts of the message effortful to follow.

TA

任务完成情况

The transfer request and reasons for staying are clear, and workplace experience is described, but what the writer has learned remains implicit and the company's benefit from the move is not clearly explained.

6.0
CC

连贯与衔接

Ideas are arranged in a broadly logical order with paragraphing that follows the bullets, though some sentences are confusing and cohesion relies on basic linkers like so and however used inaccurately.

6.0
LR

词汇丰富度

The writer shows adequate vocabulary range for the workplace topic, but errors such as 'look up on my job stats', 'overcome with various challenges', and misspellings like 'chnage', 'goot' and 'orgization' reduce precision.

6.0
GRA

语法多样性与准确性

Sentence structures are attempted with some complexity, but frequent errors in verb forms, articles and agreement, such as 'to requesting' and 'my application get accepted', reduce accuracy and sometimes clarity.

5.5

下一步改进重点

Revise the letter to correct recurring grammar and spelling errors, especially verb forms and word choice, so the request reads smoothly and professionally.

来自本题范文

实用词汇:写信给经理申请内部调换部门

来自本题范文

句型:写信给经理申请内部调换部门

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写下你的作文

已加载题目:G类小作文。
第1部分

建议用时约 20 分钟,至少写 150 词。

词数:020:00 输入第一个词后开始计时