Are People Today More Dependent or Independent?

Some people think that individuals today are more dependent on each other. Others believe people have become more independent. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Annotated response

9 correction notes

Showing 9 correction notes.

There is an ongoing debate surrounding the level of interdependence versus independence in modern society. This essay will explain the logic of both perspectives but then argue that we have become more dependent .

Proponents argue that technological advancements, economic opportunities, and personal freedoms to pursue their goals and . enable people to access information, services, and opportunities independently, reducing reliance on traditional institutions and intermediaries. Moreover, economic globalization and flexible work arrangements provide individuals with greater control over their careers and lifestyles. As a result, people are less beholden to external influences and more capable of making autonomous decisions that align with their preferences and values.

that modern society is characterized by growing interconnectedness and interdependence among individuals, communities, and nations. This is driven by numerous factors, including globalization, technological advancements, and economic interdependence. In an interconnected world, for example, people depend on each other for goods, services, information, and support, meaning that it would be extremely difficult for them to survive if they from their community. Another example is that our modern world is facing complex societal challenges such as climate change, pandemics, and economic crises, all of which require collective action and cooperation to address effectively.

In conclusion, it is undeniable that modern technological advances have allowed individuals to over their lives. Despite this, I hold the belief that there are social, economic, and technological factors which have intensified interconnectedness and interdependence on a global scale.

Overall assessment

Why this response received Band 7.0

The strongest aspect is the clear, well-structured argument that addresses both views and states a firm personal position with relevant supporting examples. The main limitation is a reliance on somewhat generic, abstract claims rather than concrete, developed illustration, which keeps the ideas from feeling fully extended.

IELTS criteria

How each score was decided

Task Response

7.0

The response addresses all parts of the task, presents a clear and consistent position, and develops main ideas with relevant examples, though support remains somewhat general rather than fully extended.

Coherence and Cohesion

7.0

Ideas are logically organised across clear paragraphs with a range of cohesive devices used effectively, although progression within paragraphs is sometimes formulaic and predictable.

Lexical Resource

7.0

A sufficient range of less common vocabulary is used with generally good control and awareness of style and collocation, though some phrasing is slightly repetitive or vague, such as numerous factors and certain level of freedom.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy

7.0

A variety of complex structures, including relative clauses and concessive patterns, is used flexibly with generally accurate grammar and punctuation, with only occasional minor awkwardness such as dependent on each one other.