Causes of Youth Violent Crime and Emotional Learning

Recent figures show an increase in violent crime among youngsters under the age of 18. Some psychologists claim that the basic reason for this is that children these days are not getting the social and emotional learning they need from parents and teachers. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

Annotated response

9 correction notes

Showing 9 correction notes.

It does seem to be true that parents teachers have lost the authority they used to have, especially in the eyes of teenagers. They are no longer seen as behavior: hard work, politeness and other positive qualities are seen as old fashioned. Many young people have no respect for these qualities or the people who represent them. In fact, I think when young people today are so rebellious that it's possible that both parents and teachers are afraid to exercise their authority. However, I do not agree that this is the basic reason for the increase in teenage violence.

While I believe it is true that a lack of social and emotional learning contributes to the problem. Other factors are surely involved: economic factors, for example. If a child comes from a poor family and they live in low-quality housing area, this is sure to affect the child, however loving the parents are.

There is also the question of . I believe that when you are in your teens your friends have more influence on you than your parents or teachers. At that age, part of a group, or even a gang, and this might lead to breaking the law in a number of ways.

In conclusion, while I of social and emotional learning from parents and teachers is a factor in the growth of teenage violence, I do not believe that it is the only or main cause.

Overall assessment

Why this response received Band 7.0

The strongest aspect is the clear, consistent position that social and emotional learning is a contributing factor but not the main cause of youth violence, supported by plausible alternative explanations. The main limitation is uneven language control, with noticeable article and clause-structure errors, and ideas that remain somewhat thinly developed rather than fully extended.

IELTS criteria

How each score was decided

Task Response

7.0

The response addresses the question directly, states a clear stance in the introduction and conclusion, and develops the main argument with relevant alternative causes, though some points are only briefly extended.

Coherence and Cohesion

7.0

Progression is logical across paragraphs with effective linking of ideas, although a sentence fragment and slightly mechanical transitions occasionally disrupt the flow.

Lexical Resource

7.0

Vocabulary is sufficient and often natural for the topic, including phrases like 'exercise their authority' and 'lead to breaking the law', but slips such as 'in all undesirable area' and imprecise wording recur.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy

6.5

A range of complex structures is attempted and often controlled, but noticeable errors, including the fragment 'While I believe it is true that...' and faulty relative and conditional phrasing, reduce accuracy.